Glowing Grey

I had an epiphany last week and it has been mulling around on my mind ever since. I’ve learned over the years that once an idea cements it’s way in there, it’s hard to remove without spending the time to put some kind of order to it and see what happens.

I’m never short on ideas. They come frequently and at random moments, every one promising a change for the better. But I’ve come to realise that is rarely the outcome.

Sometimes my ideas fill me with excitement, mostly with trepidation, but more often than not, they die a quick death as they drown in the sea of unfulfilled dreams and half-hearted attempts.

So history tells me that it isn’t always a good idea to act impulsively on these inklings. Better to sit with them awhile and ponder their meaning to see whether they are worthy of my time or destined to go swimming with the fishes.

Our eldest son lives about an hour from us and we talk regularly during the week as is our routine. We developed the habit a number of years ago of talking on our way home from work, as we navigated peak hour traffic, and the ritual has stuck. Even though I no longer work full time and now chat from the comfort of my lounge chair, we continue our ritual as he drives home after work.

While we were talking the other day it dawned on me that I never really have anything exciting or new to talk about. Even though there is never a shortage of conversation, I noticed I rarely share something I have done during the week that isn’t the same old, same old. Maybe something new I’ve started or a place I’ve gone. Anything that makes me sound like I have a social life.

And that is where my epiphany came in.

I realised the habit of always working and coming home to do chores, eat, sleep and repeat still influences my day. It’s a deeply ingrained habit.

One of the reasons I went to working only 3 days a week was not only because of health reasons, but to have time to spend at least one of those days on myself. But I’m not doing that the way I want and feel I’m wasting the time I’ve now got.

Being married and having a mortgage at 20 years old has taught us the value of money very early in life. Having our first child at 21 and living on one wage for 10 years instilled in us the value of working hard, living frugally and paying down our debts as fast as possible. The goal being that working hard now would pay off in the future.

Well, it is now the future and while I’ve slowed a great deal regarding the hours I’m working, my free time can be better filled with the things that interest me and help me to enjoy my life.

Part of my reason for starting this blog was to not only process my thoughts and write about life as I age, but also to discover ways in which I mean to age with vitality. My goal is to be 90 years old and still enjoying my life, independently, with a fair amount of get up and go still in me.

The more I learn about ageing with health and longevity in mind, exercise, food and community play a big part. I’ll admit I’m haphazard on the exercise, am pretty good with food but, I feel I can improve on the community.

For me, community not only means our close relationships but also enjoying the company of others who share common interests. While we have our off-road club which we love, I’m on the hunt for more connections through creativity and personal interests that I hope will enrich my life. Along the way it will be fun to try different things and find the activities that I enjoy the most.

So while skydiving and rock climbing may not be on the list, there are still many different things I’m keen to discover like:

• trying different forms of exercise like yoga, pilates or swimming
• taking a class in something creative like life drawing or watercolour classes
• take an online class in creative writing, learn a language or something else to feed my brain
• join a community group

So my homework this week is to do some research on a couple of ideas I have to start me off. I’m calling it “Operation Glowing Grey” because it’s a long term project and all good projects need a title.

I’ll keep you posted.

Until next time,

Thank you for reading.